Shadow Light

Shadows light,

shadows bright,

shadows chase my soul tonight.

Well, for the moment I'm running just as fast as I can,

because I've been there before & don't want to live through that again.

But I am so tired, and I am running out of breath,

am I really that sure that the shadows bring death?

Perhaps if I stand very, very still, they will just pass me by,

maybe, instead, I should try to search for a place to hide.

No, No, you've never given up so easily before,

and now you have found something worth living for.

If you cannot run anymore, then turn around & fight,

face the shadows, and take back the night.

Yes I can, yes I will,

death be damned, it's my time to kill,

I am the Lorax, and I speak for me,

I will do whatever I must to live & live free.


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As I Am

 As I Am  

I am alone, not a slave to your beliefs,
I am immune, I am free,
I am who I want to be.
Can you take for who I am,
judgment be damned,
can you take me just as I am? 





~ My random reflections on this poem ~
2 songs by the Exies inspired my poem a few years ago. I embedded the videos that show the lyrics b/c it gives a little context to the poem and now I just find both songs inspiring. I listened to the 3rd one back then but it'd just make me sad, but now it gets me all fired up & ready to share my opinions ( pun entirely intended ). It's an interesting twist of the feelings but sometimes it's good to remember just how far I've come back into the world.

Back in 2004 I stopped caring about everything and just didn't bother with opinions at all. By the time I wrote this poem I cared enough to  start forming opinions about me and trying to convey them. Most importantly I finally cared enough to feel hurt but not enough to hold onto the anger in the song "My Opinion" & use it for the motivation I needed to try things out. It was a particularly harsh song for me to listen to back then b/c it would get me mad, am determined to prove something to somebody or at least myself. But I couldn't, and so went the cycle of anger and sadness - dejected is actually a better word for how I was feeling then. Now, I trying every day & that song gets me going with the anger.

Full Disclosure:
I also included a link that takes you directly to the Amazon.com MP3 store where it's just 0.99$ to download any of the songs that you like as well. That link is b/c I needed every pitiful % of the penny that I'd get if you click on it & buy the song from Amazon.

~ The 3 Songs by The Exies ~ The Exies MySpace Page in case you want more of them after hearing "Normal", "Ugly", and "My Opinion" here. The lyrics are shown for Normal & Ugly which is new to me so it was kinda cool to watch and convenient if you have keep the noise down. Anyway, thanks for reading all this, I'll be quiet now. Enjoy! :)

~ ~ ~  Normal  ~ ~ ~
 



~ ~ ~  Ugly  ~ ~ ~



 ~ ~ ~  My Opinion  ~ ~ ~

Have a wonder filled life!

Topping It Off

I’m not cynical, just detachedly clinical.

Tell me, how do you feel now that you’'ve reached the pinnacle?

Are you happy yet ? Can you touch the sky?

Now that you have it all, do you want to die?

Or live it up and risk the fall?

Are you straddling or standing tall?

Still trying to balance and hold onto it all?

The choice is there — it’s time to raise or call.

Evolving Solution

When life was just a game, I loved to play.

But suddenly it’s real — ultimately surreal.

And the stakes are higher than I ever thought they’d be.

There’s no endgame, but still a need for strategy.

They may patronize, but still I strategize for a goal I’ve yet to realize.

The pieces fit, I know this, I watched as they fell apart.

Never quite picked them up but I came alive —

Tabula Rasa, slightly faded and just a little jaded.

Started anew but now thinking I should go back.

Pick up those pieces and puzzle it out because

as I’ve been reflecting on the evidence I’ve been collecting,

I have seen so many memories I’ve been neglecting.

I knew so much more than I ever gave myself credit for.

I had the certainty that comes with clarity.

I simply lacked the confidence to bring it into reality.

So afraid of being mistaken that my whole world collapsed when it was suddenly shaken.

I chose to build a house of cards and for a long while it held high,

but it was never strong and I wasn’t meant to fly.

A puzzle, put together rationally, held together by confidence and unshakable belief

will withstand, because I finally understand.

I was never the problem, I am the solution.

And I have the will, the way and, the resolution.

I don’t need a revolution, this is simply evolution.

Save Yourself

Wake up, no one is waiting to save you.
Face it, nobody is there to save you.
Find, or make, a method to your madness.
Create an outlet for you sadness -
let it all out for the world to see.
Do not hide within or you'll never be free.
Get up, move, go out and do something - anything.
Once you've found a path, you can begin to mend.

Bye-Bye Misery

If misery loves company,
she'll soon be very lonely.
Because I'd rather risk it all and be alone
then spend one more moment bowing at her throne.
Every moment wasted, is an opportunity lost:
Thus any risk taken is worth the cost.

Never Not Knotted